Do You Have A Switch Or A Dimmer?

This content was originally published on March 14th, 2019. It has been slightly modified to remove previously time-relevant events for current consumption.

As of publishing on this blog, we are in the middle of a global pandemic and Snuggle with Sam does not condone actively working with clients in person at this time.

Growing up, I was a great student, but only for certain periods of time. I think most people can relate to procrastinating on their school projects, studying only at the last minute, and taking a nap after school before getting started on schoolwork. Somehow, I managed to get A's and B's for the most part.

But then I went to college, and I did procrastinate kind of, but... well, the college I went to didn't do semesters or trimesters.  We did 7-week terms of 3-4 nonstop classes with the full content of a semester course. I didn't really have time to procrastinate because by the time I turned in one assignment, the next big one was due in three days. So I was constantly working, learning, proving to others and myself that I belonged at this engineering school. Looking back, I was stubborn AF and probably should have switched out of engineering after my third C, but as that school had said, “C’s get degrees.”

I went to the hospital twice-- twice! -- while in college for injuries I had and I went right back to studying as soon as I was cleared to leave the hospital both times.  Oh, and those were both on weekends.

Not to mention I was also captain of the ballroom dance team, head tutor at the writing center, an undergrad TA for an introductory course in my major, and a private tutor for a homeschooled kid.

I was CONSTANTLY on.

But the beauty of this schedule was that our breaks were longer and more frequent.  We had 4 of these 7-week terms, and we had a 10-day break in October, December through January, a typical spring break, and then an early start to summer (the year I graduated the last day of classes was in April).

You know what I did during those breaks?  Usually nothing. I couldn't bring myself to work anymore (except during the long summer breaks we had), so I just played games, drank, drove to parties my sister dragged me to, and danced.

The best way I can describe that work ethic is it's like a light switch-- my work mode is either on or off.  When I'm on, I'm on. I hyperfocus on the task at hand to the point that I know everything about the topic and see the possibilities from ten different angles (which can be a good thing or a bad thing).

Now let me explain to you the opposite example by describing what it was like for me when I had ACL surgery last year.

I had surgery on a Tuesday, and then I was on painkillers until Friday, so I was in no state of mind to do anything at that point (I even cancelled teaching a web course because I was so out of it-- luckily my co-creator was able to do it himself). The following week was limiting my commitments to what I absolutely have to do and creating when inspiration hits me hard enough.

This is what I'll call being in light dimmer mode. I wasn’t working fulltime like I wanted to be, but I was still getting things done.

I’ve beat myself up for not being more productive. When you're used to being a light switch, having a dimmer might make you think that you're not working "properly."

But you're still working!

Luckily, my boyfriend reminded me that I wasn't just laying around all day every day (even if all I did some days was play trashy romance visual novel games).  I was working.

It just didn't feel like work because I had associated work with grinding, hustling, and being productive more often than not.

I couldn’t work at the level that I'm used to, and that's not necessarily a bad thing.

With this work ethic, it’s more like a light dimmer.  Some days I get nothing done at all and see no clients, but I might think about or plan out next steps that need to happen on more motivated days. That's a small level of work. Some days I might schedule calls with clients and walk them through what to expect out of a session. Some days I might upload or edit some videos.  Some days I might write.

And some days I might do a few of these things and more. And some days I might go easier.

But did I still do work? Yes!  Just because I didn't do all the things doesn't mean I should get none of the credit. I still worked. I just didn't work as much and as effectively as I probably wanted to.

Forget gold star work. A silver or bronze star is still a star!

Now, I'm not suggesting that you go just check emails all day and call that a silver star-- you still need to prioritize relevant tasks so that you’re making meaningful progress.

But what I am suggesting is that we should all mentally be kinder to ourselves on the days we're less productive. Especially right now with COVID-19, none of us are really working at full capacity.

If I had a choice, I'd much rather have a light dimmer for my work ethic than a light switch. And hopefully well after this pandemic we can all allow ourselves to use a dimmer as our work ethic more often than demanding our work ethic be like light switch.