Things Aren't Going to Be the Same and We're All Adjusting

We’re getting closer and closer to out of this pandemic and getting closer to having the lifestyle we used to have.

During this time, I uncovered some truths about myself. Truths about my mind, my family, my relationships, how I treat my friends, how I view other people…

And some of them are small things that change how I live my life on a day to day basis. I might be able to keep these things while my life readjusts to life with the world opening up again… but I’m likely going to fight things.

Maybe you realized something about yourself too or made a small change that makes a huge difference in your life.

Maybe like me, you now make a running grocery list every time you run out of something in the house so you can be a responsible adult (seriously, this has been a simple game-changer for me #adulting).

Maybe you are very done with all the group chats you’re a part of and don’t even have FOMO anymore because there’s just so much going on in the world that you’re now okay with potentially missing something.

Maybe you took some online classes and started a new career.

Maybe you started a business and made new friends through it.

Maybe you have a new hobby you took up and want to keep doing (I started playing tennis and went back to running, though I’m still low distance and slow AF).

Maybe you’re more aware of your own mental health needs and how you best work, especially at home.

Maybe you got more involved in activism efforts or charities or mutual aid groups.

Maybe you’re looking at the version of yourself right now and realizing that you’ve grown.

Or maybe your time in isolation outright sucked every minute.

Maybe you felt yourself going backwards.

Maybe you really went off the rails with booze or drugs.

Maybe you got hospitalized but not for COVID.

Maybe you lost your job.

Maybe you lost someone.

Maybe you got evicted.

Maybe you saw your closest friends have belief systems you can’t stand behind or tolerate anymore.

Maybe you found yourself doomscrolling endlessly.

Or maybe you’re just tired.

Maybe self-care wasn’t enough for you these days when you could feel the world falling apart.

Maybe you were worried you weren’t doing enough.

Maybe you just couldn’t deal anymore and kept your head to the grindstone.

Maybe you’re shocked you’ve managed to get up and do anything the past 15 months.

Maybe you struggled to get up some days because holy sugar, we’re having another enormous awful thing happen that’s shitty in the world today?

Maybe you had empathy fatigue like I did.

Maybe you’re not sure how socializing is going to be when all of us are this fucking tired. You might feel tired just trying to think of a topic to talk about with a friend.

After the last time I had to hermit, I knew that socializing like I used to was going to be a weird thing for me to do for a while.

This time it isn’t just one person learning to be a socially adept human being though.

It’s all of us.

People are different now. We’re different. And the memories we’ve had of each other may have some stark differences from the weathered person you see in the flesh.

I don’t want to hear the phrase “What’s wrong with you?” ever for the rest of my life, but especially right now as people are vulnerably trying to readjust to having to hermit for so long.

I’m lucky; I got my vaccine early on and have been open for cuddling since March, so I’ve had time to adjust to being around humans. I’ve had the chance to see people struggling to adjust to being in person with people again. I got to witness the awkwardness of not being in front of a screen to communicate and the relief of physical touch from people for the first time in a long time.

I’m so, so happy I get to be a part of the process.

So no, things aren’t going to be the same. And that’s okay. We’re all adjusting, and we’ll all find a way to make the world—and our worlds— a better place as we do.

And if you feel you need some dedicated help with that (or just a place to collapse with no shame in doing so), I’m here for you.